Gloc Lobstah 31 Jul - Year 12

Batsey reports that the tables are ordered, and plans for the 12th annual LobsterFesque are afoot. I'm guessing the water level in the quarry is not so much a problem now, with the recent flooding. Or if not yet, after this moist week, we'll be up to our eyebrows in wet. Health inspectors are making me install flotation rings in my basement. Non sequitur? I don't think! So?

Thanks to them what answered the list of questions from the last e-mail. Your answers have been tabulated and are on Funk & Wagnall's porch, hermetically sealed in a mayonnaise jar, if memory serves. But now's the time to hear from the rest of the crowd, so if you haven't already, please send along answers to at least 1-5, below.

Questions what require answers:

1) Am I coming to this year's SANE Gloc Lobstah Fesque & Clam Gobble
on Sat 31 July 2010?
2) How many in my party?
3) How many lobsters will my party consume?
4) How many my group will wanna glom clams?
5) What delectable dish/item would I like to bring along with me/us?

Extra Credit Questions:

6) Did Ike ever get a hole-in-one in one of his many "cabinet
meetings" on the links?
7) Was the lost episode of Last better than the 25th episode of 24?
8) Why did the porridgebird's brain turn to mush?

Lemme know soonly,

Gloc Lobstah 31 Jul - Year 12

Guess what's coming for dinner on Saturday, 31 July 2010?

It's hard to think about eating these little arthropods when they look so durn cute!
Put on your thinking antenna and decide several things:

1) Am I coming to this year's SANE Gloc Lobstah Fesque & Clam Gobble on Sat 31 July 2010?
2) How many in my party?
3) How many lobsters will my party consume?
4) How many my group will wanna glom clams?
5) What delectable dish/item would I like to bring along with me/us?
6) Was LBJ right to "practice escalatio" on the Vietnamese?
7) Did the last episode of Lost really make it worth it watching for all them damn seasons?
8) Is Richard really visible wincing convincingly in the front row of the stands when the "young Chris Rock" character gets beaned by a basketball in Grown Ups? Is that him flailing away at the Hustle on the far right of the gymnasium, in what is most likely a behind-the-credits scene or DVD extra? (Even he doesn't yet know the answer to these last questions, but he might find out in a day or so.)

It's gettin' on time to be commencin' to be thinkin' about decidin' about these here things.
Granpa McCoy

Chin-dog-gone

SANEsters,

Chindogu went well - tho we all admitted to a mass of last-minitude, the results were still impressive. But first, a general announcement:

GlobsterFesque 2010, the famed fete, is scheduled for sunny Saturday 31 July -- keep posted for further denouncements.

Chindogi - reading about them is a poor substitute for seeing them and hearing the pitches. But for the record:

Flip: A Photic Sneezer Hat - after long explanation of Nordic light-induced sneezing behavior as an inherited survival trait (ask him about Cro Magnon kids licking cave rocks, for a start), the hat-mounted mirror will keep a window in your world dedicated to checking if your own nose is leaking. As a side note, it can detect stuff caught in your teeth.

Molly: A ruler, complete with snazzy case, measuring units in increments of US Route 40 from Flagstaff to Albuquerque. The ruler was three "Querqs" long, and was also subdivided into subunits Winslows, noting (of course) that there were 5 1/8 Winslows per Querq.

Richard: Mood-O-Matic Facial Mood Modules to help return the expression to heavily Botoxed or Plastic-Surgery-tightened faces. Special Dive-Mask Modules too, for underwater communications.

Betsey: Unable to complete her dream Chindogu of a bowl for disposing pistachio shells, made out of pistachio shells (note: no glue sticks to them!), she created the No. 1 Travel Accessory, plastic bags with snappy ties to wrap around your feet if you walk around an airline cabin, encase hands to use in "bacteria=laden bathrooms," inflate as a neck rest or cushion between your and your neighbor's thighs, use as (see through!) airsick bags, trash bags and to wrap over your head as air reservoir/splash guard in the event of water crash landing.

Mary: Air Poppers, Clean Air in a Bubble: Individual doses of clean air in small plastic pockets, wrapped up in plastic bags. Volcanic ash, Canadian smoke or plain ol' pollution a problem? Just pop an Air Popper in your mouth and bite: "they burst in your mouth, allowing clean air to enter your lungs." A string of bubbles for rapid-fire relief, or bigger sizes (Grand Bubble and Mega Bubble) with tube and strap for hands-free operation.

Leslie: Emergency Wet-Floor Walker: Every time you wash the kitchen floor, somebody in the house will have an immediate need to walk across it. No problem, with the peanut-shaped sponges you tie to your feet, you actually help dry off the floor rather than leave footprints! Serena-tested, Mother-approved!

--- These definitely needed to be seen/experienced for maximum effectiveness, a brief description merely tantalizes. Inventors are invited to defend their projects by sending me a different explanation I can post.

May your dogs have many chins.

SANE Parking

A quick word about parking in Somerville. If you do not have the requisite current parking sticker and you turn off your car's engine whilst it is parked in a street anywhere in Somerville (not at a meter, not counting Sundays), you will be whisked away and your car firebombed and your income taxes audited.

How, pray tell, can I prevent this catastrophe from happening on SANE night? I hear you ask. Well, you could not come, but that would just be giving in, wouldn't it? No, you should come, you must come! You could carpool, but that would require preplanning and organization. No, you must pull up the driveway (the one leading to the garage that matches the house), two abreast (he tittered) near the garage door, careful not to mash the plantoids, then in single file down the drive. If we do not all fit, perhaps Joan & Milly will lend us their driveway, one mere house away (on the downhill side) to use for the event. We will monitor all arrivals closely to prevent auto carnage.

Do not let this dissuade you, merely alter your habitage of parkation in the 'hood.

Hope to see your Chindog and U tonight!

Chindog Me